I realize that I am the mother of two children- three days shy of being two years apart. . I pat myself on the back for being a DAMN GOOD mother. The far and between moments where I do have a brief second to reflect, I smile. I thank God for blessing my womb.

I realize that I’m getting ready to release my first published book titled, “The Book About Nothing”. Eeeeek! I couldn’t be happier.

I realize that I need “Mommy Day(s)” just to go have a nice lunch w/ a girlfriend, adjust car seat straps, deep-clean the house, wash the car, pay the bills, and/or blog. Anything outside of these things are going to co$t me. (I need to start babysitting)

I realize that I am currently in the “comeback” of my “setback”. God is replacing everything lost or stolen plus interest.

I realize that love doesn’t exist to me except through Jesus. I’m not cold, but I’m focused. I’m being a friend but not too close. No, I’m not scared to trust again, but I don’t have to prove that to anyone.

I realize that we’ve succumbed to the pressure of society. No one is willing to be alone to get themselves together. Reverse psychology and manipulation are at an all-time high. My expertise is obviously being understanding and open-minded like “oh, you’re living with your parents, it’s OK- you’re just getting back on your feet” understanding. It seems that the majority of men are dependent.

I also realize that I don’t excuse laziness, complacency, wasteful spending on bullshit, white lies, and/or hoe-tendencies (going or coming).

I realize that no one tells you what to do in case you still love the one who taught you “your lesson”. No one tells you how to unlove the “bad guy” who would give a stranger the shirt off his back if you had just the slightest chill. No one tells you how to unlove the born sinner whose crime is that he sins differently than you. No one tells you how to unlove who your heart continues to love through all the pain they’ve caused. No one tells you how to unlove who would meet you in the middle with your portion to make it a whole thing.

No one tells you.

Until Next Time…

-Alex